Not Luck
Being At The Right Place At The Right Time Is The Key To Success, You Can Go Crazy Running Around Trying, or Just Understand Playing The Odds.
Both You and Mr or Ms Right need to know....
Both Interested,
and...Currently "Available" at the same time.
and being there (right place, right time) to let them know......
Rest is easy.....
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Divorced-Starting Over-Dating Again
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How Many Have Your Friends Had End?
Harlan Jacobsen. Copyright © 2009 |
Remember that first romance... When it ended, you were devastated. You thought it was the end of the world but survived.
Turned out, if you recall, it was not the end of the world, and you went on to bigger and better.
Count back, how many relationships have ended in your life time til now? This one had paper work, and it was guaranteed for life?
Not really, that was your fairy tale idea and "the Cleavers and the white picket fence." The average marriage now
with paper work is under seven years.
But you say, "I have been betrayed, abandoned in a real time of need."
End of relationships happen every day and a big percentage just incidentally happen with BAD timing. Not sure there is "good timing", just some worse then others.
When bad timing happens to you, do not take it personal.
You must get past the "why me" and get on with reality. It happens with everybody dealing with relationships. It is like death and taxes, once you accept them, and stop fighting them, you can move on, and realize you do not have to "like reality happenings" of this sort, you just have to realize they are normal happenings to everybody and you, too, can, do and will get past them. (Nobody said you had to like it, just deal with it without messing up your life unnecessarily.)
Stop seeing yourself as a victim.
You were half of a pair. Each half is a volunteer, neither controls or owned the other half even though you thought you had "official paper work" that said you did. It was official for as long as it lasted.
So it ended. Ending relationships with the society sanctioned "official paper work" becomes a hassle, a problem instead of an assistance. It gives you no leverage at all.
A "poor me" attitude leaves you feeling defensive -- and defenseless you learn to overcome this little kid: "I am a victim mentality."
It happens to everybody in relationships. They all end, one or the other leaves, unexpectedly, mostly other ways, but if nothing else one leaves by death.
No exceptions.
You thought that you alone were going to "beat the "relationship" system". Faulty unrealistic expectation.
Do not waste time trying for months to Analyze "how or why did this happen?". What can I learn so it never happens to me again? Answer: Nothing. No two are the same.
That is like trying to figure out how to beat death and taxes. A complete waste of time.
Nobody beats it, so give up and move on. You graduated from another relationship.
It matters not, whether you were the one that decided the relationship was outgrown, whether you were the leavor, or the leavee. When one decides it's over, it's over.
You can not put humpty dumpty back together again, and no use wasting a lot of time trying. Accept reality, what is, is.
No use being angry. No use trying to "get even". Just delays you moving on down the road to a new and better life and bigger and better relationship. Does not hurt them, it hurts you. Like shooting yourself in the foot.
Your marriage was perhaps a good part of your life.
It has now moved to a "WHAT WAS."
It was just an end of a chapter in your life,, not the book.
Close the cover on that chapter, spend all your time and energy now figuring out what you want to happen in the "GOING TO BE" chapter.
Close up the WHAT WAS: chapter, open up the "GOING TO BE" and let's get right with it.
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Harlan's NEW "Help Sites" for Hard Times
A "Laid off" site that is called "Laid off, go here" and an online support group, "Laid off talk here"site for the "surprise your unemployed" pink slip recipients. For those who can not find a job and decide to become self employed, a site called "hiredmyself".
To keep informed on recession trends, a directory of maps and graphs, where unemployment is, and where the jobs are etc. called of course, Recession Maps and Graphs. A one look view of whats happening.
Harlan was diagnosed with Diabetes, and obesity, over four years ago, and spent four years, researching both, now publishes his finding "what works" in a newspaper and a web site called "Diabetes Cure 101 and the Obesity fix at YB Fat 101.
Also wound up with a lot of research that uncovered Longevity Steps and puts that all up to pass along to you in "Outlive Your doctor" web site. Harlan is now over 80 and in excellent health, if that helps.
The key to both Harlan found is a switch in what you eat, and this site explaining that is called "the ancestors diet."
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Help To Build a Network Of Single Friends
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