You are divorced....(even if you have not completed the paperwork...)
You can't fix or change what you don't acknowledge.
Your long term relationship has died.
We don't want to admit to others or to ourselves that we have a problem.
That is why AA considers it so important for members to say the words:
"I am an alcoholic".
We tell you it is very important that you admit to yourself...."I am
DIVORCED. I am now a "single" person.
Instead, you say to yourself...the divorce is not final...yet.. they
may come to their senses and come back etc. etc.
You must deal with reality, marriage is "what was", DIVORCED is what
is.
Sure, you can kid yourself and pretend you are in "crazy making" no mans
land...half way between marriage and divorced. There is no half way
house. There is no being put on "hold".
(the stage of paper work of divorce is not to be confused with or used
to muddy up the emotional or factual end or death of a relationship.)
Our best method of explaining it is, your faithful long time horse,
(marriage) died.
What you have been doing is "beating on this dead horse" of yours and
trying to get it to come back to life.... You could always revive ti
before.....
How long are you going to keep beating on what you and everybody else
now know is a dead horse.....??????
It is not just a little dead, it is fully dead.
If is like being a little pregnant....there is no such thing....
Why did my horse have to die? This should not have happened to me....
We say, trying to figure out why your horse died wont help right
now.....you just need to admit your horse is dead,....and before your
life starts to smell even worse....bury your dead horse... and move on
down the road.
Whether it is fear, an addiction, or a bad habit, etc, the first step is
to admit that there is a problem. Acknowledge what is not working in
your life.
Pretending to yourself, that you are still in a relationship that has
died keeps your life from working.
Tell Your Divorced Or Widowed Friends About This Article And Site, Send Them This Page Or If They Do Not Have A PC, Print Out The Article For Them
Bury Your Marriage, It Died
Send this article to a friend
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